


Sometimes We Turn To Laughs To Hide

by ivanolix



Category: Battlestar Galactica (2003)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Canon - TV, F/M, Het, Wordcount: 1.000-5.000
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-02-17
Updated: 2010-02-17
Packaged: 2017-10-24 12:18:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,999
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/263398
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ivanolix/pseuds/ivanolix
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A half an hour glimpse into a universe where the world has split completely into Cylons and humans, and both sides are struggling in their own ways, but some can find happiness even if it wavers on the edge of over-the-top. AU (universe goes alternate around the time of Black Market, but fic takes place around the end of Season 2).</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sometimes We Turn To Laughs To Hide

**Author's Note:**

> This is yet another fic prompted by a "make Dee happy" urge a while back, but this one went into...interesting territory. Projection isn't just visual among the Cylons. But there is hope, despite this being a pretty crappy universe for everyone. Although also maybe a little indulgence in their defense mechanism?

“Ah!” Dee’s eyebrows rose and her lips unpursed, hands still in the conduit fluid as she worked around the last couple of protocols. The numbers and symbols glowed before her in the goo, reflecting on the smooth black walls to either side.

“What is it?” A Six moved quickly over from where she’d been playing chess with Leoben (and looking terribly bored as he still refused to make his move).

“I’m getting a signal,” Dee said, a smile slowly appearing, having definitely needed to do something other than just filling the day like they usually tried. “It’s far off, but—”

“You can’t stop the signal,” Leoben finished, nodding, following the Six.

“What is it?” called Sam from over where he was helping Athena change Hera’s diaper.

“Earth,” Dee called back over to him with joy.

 “Really?” Tory sounded suddenly interested as her head darted up from her book.

“Really, what?” Saul repeated, with a look that said he was never sure anymore if he wanted to know the answers, as he and Ellen strolled into the basestar’s control center.

Things like this happened every day with the Cylons, Dee had realized, changes that weren’t _normal_ —only at the same time they didn’t, and it was all part of a particular cycle. But this one they all needed to hear about.

ooo

“Isn’t it amazing?” Lee had his arms spread as if mere words couldn’t hold it all in. “I mean, I haven’t had any experience, so I had no hopes, but with so few people—” He broke off, looking down at the results of the first real fleet election.

“What does this mean for us, Lee?” Kara stared at the paper, frowning, tapping her fingers on the table’s edge.

Lee breathed out, ran a hand through his hair. “Well, I guess I’ll have to bring you on as my military advisor—or bodyguard. Something like that.”

“Something like that,” Kara intoned, still staring at the paper. She hadn’t thought that she’d regret Roslin dying of her cancer quite so much, not when she’d barely known her. But with the Cylon attacks affecting their numbers (even before they’d supposedly left for good along with their precious ‘Final Five’), Lee was one of the better qualified candidates, unless the fleet planned to force someone who didn’t want the job into the position.

“Kara, the president can’t live on Galactica, it would present too dangerous a target when the Cylons come back.” Lee caught her concern and stepped in closer. “Unless you just don’t want me to be president?”

“Lee, I did not marry you to end up as just Mrs. President Lee Adama,” Kara said, the words rolling off her tongue quickly as she looked up at him.

“That’s not an answer,” Lee protested and frowned.

He didn’t have to tell her that.

ooo

All the Cylons crowded around the fluid consoles when Dee called, leaning over each other so that they could look at what she was projecting onto the visible screen floating above the tubs, even though they couldn’t read the electrical signals like she did.

“You really did it.” Sam exhaled with a broad smile and his arm snuck around Dee’s waist, squeezing.

“It was your idea,” she said back, aglow anyways. “Those skills in deducing human communications weren’t as worthless as I thought, apparently.”

“But we don’t know it’s Earthen, it’s just an ancient signal.” Tory frowned as her fingers found nothing more explanatory in the cool liquid.

“Tory,” Leoben murmured while giving her a lover’s chiding look.

“Am I wrong?” she protested, looking around at them all with one seriously raised eyebrow.

The Six looked a little worried, and Dee had noticed how the Sixes in particular still seemed uneasy by the occasional disagreements that the Cylons had now that they were trying more and more to be human, like the Five.

“No, she’s right,” admitted Dee. She drew her hand out and wiped it clean. “But just think how unlikely any other explanation is. We’ve been following the signs from the Book of Pythia, after all.”

Ellen laughed suddenly and looked cheerier than she did five glasses into ambrosia night. “Finally! Finally we can get to the end and see something other than these frakking identical hallways.”

“Maybe we’ll find something to explain how we can be frakking Cylons,” Tigh mumbled. After an accidental dream given to a Six had revealed the Final Five, and when after the Cylons had come looking for them the fleet had just cast the Five out to the enemy where they belonged, he’d been the least accepting of the new knowledge. Not that the others were entirely comfortable, but they tried to repress that and live more normally.

“That would be nice,” Sam admitted in answer to Saul, and for all that he was the one making the best of this, it _was_ frakking confusing if thought about too closely.

“Or at least find out why the Final Five are able to bear children with each other, while we are not,” added the Six, glancing at Dee’s slowly swelling belly.

They all stood silent, Leoben looking conflicted at Tory as he stood just behind her, Sam looking proud and happy as his fingers gently stroked where his child grew inside Dee, Ellen looking like she wanted a drink.

“Procreation isn’t everything,” Tory said, even though she couldn’t look at Leoben when she said it.

Ellen didn’t look quite like she agreed, or that she’d rather at least have the choice.

“But in any case, we need to get ready, see what lies ahead.” Tory turned around, all in Leoben’s personal space as he stood with his arms resting around her on the tub’s edge. “Leoben?”

“Yes?” His fingertips rose to absently brush at where her dark curls fell on her shoulder.

“You can talk to the Hybrid about what this means?” She looked at him closely. “To make sure?”

He gave her a small smile, then kissed her lightly so that his stubble scraped at her jawline. “You speak my language,” he murmured.

“Someone has to,” Tory said back dryly, lips quirking but eyes warm.

“Come on, I’ll cheer _you_ up with some celebration,” Ellen whispered in Saul’s ear as she danced her fingers on his neck.

Despite being disgruntled in general, Saul Tigh was not displeased at that idea at all. They disappeared too quickly for the comfort of the younger couples, and left the rest trying to absorb just what Dee had discovered.

ooo

Kara looked around Colonial One and then shook her head as she found an answer for Lee. “I still want to be CAG.”

He looked concerned and then put a hand on her arm. “Kara, you know you don’t have to prove yourself to me, or—or anyone.”

“Did I say anything about proving myself?” Kara shot back, brow creasing.

“You want to be the best, you always have.” Lee waved his hand in her direction. “I mean, it’s not surprising, given your past.” Kara flinched and looked away. “But Kara, you don’t have to.”

“I don’t fly to spite my mother, Lee,” Kara said shortly, and looked him straight in the eye. He sounded like Helo back when they first met and Helo was being a pretentious asshole, and this was one thing she wouldn’t let anyone talk loosely about—not even Lee.

“Then why don’t you come back to what you used to do?” Lee asked and pushed forward. “It’s not flight instruction exactly, but being an advisor is a similar role. I do need your knowledge.”

“Because I don’t want to, Lee.” Kara stared at him and waited for him to truly hear. “Because what used to be is gone forever; it’s not coming back.” If she hadn’t figured that out the first time she’d gone to the Colonies, she’d definitely figured it out when Cain sent her back to rescue the resistance, and it was just the nail in the coffin when Cain and all her traditional ways died because of the Cylons.

“That doesn’t mean you have to just stick with what you’ve got, instead of trying for something better,” Lee insisted, and put a hand to her arm as he looked at her intimately.

“Are you not listening?” Kara wondered how this desperate move to keep the fleet going had turned into something approaching disaster, something that scared her, because she wasn’t always sure she could pull it out of the fire—and she needed to. “Lee, I want to fly. I want that much out of my life, I don’t want to be anyone else, especially not some politician’s aide, even if it’s for you. Gods, Lee, even _Leoben_ understood that flying is something ‘better’.”

Lee blinked and jerked back a little. “Oh, right, Kara, because that was so called for,” he said under his breath, turning away with fingers twitching, wanting to clench.

Kara grimaced. “Lee, I didn’t—”

“Didn’t what, Kara?” Lee asked, but didn’t look fully away from her.

Her tongue twisted in her mouth as she couldn’t actually deny anything she’d said. “I didn’t mean it like that. Just—you’re president, I’m not, think of something else. There’s got to be a way that doesn’t involve separate ships.”

“Or what?” Lee asked as he looked into her eyes.

“Does it have to be about an ultimatum?” Kara’s brow remained furrowed.

Lee breathed out and looked down.

ooo

Sam stood at the datafont for a couple seconds more, exhaling and musing over the end of this journey that had started with such deep pain, and yet had brought enough success to keep them content for now. He hoped that they all thought the same about this, the original Cylons and him and the rest of the Five. Earth would be a home where they could all live quietly; that was their only stated goal at least.

He gulped down excitement as he thought of this new signal that held so much potential, and felt the satisfaction of accomplishing this in cooperation and without death or disaster. That achievement was enough to turn his mind back to the happier parts of his life.

“Well, that’s enough standing around for Sammy Jr. and mother,” he said, scooping Dee up into his arms so that she squeaked and reached for his neck to steady herself.

“Sam!” she objected, as he strolled back to what passed for a living room with her snugly resting in his broad arms.

“Hmm?” he asked, looking down with innocent-looking blue eyes.

She just stared smilingly at him, arms still around his neck as he carried her. “What if it’s a girl?”

“Sammy Jr’s still a very fine name.” He nuzzled her nose as he sat down, resting her on his lap in the armchair. She was just small enough to fit comfortably, even four months pregnant.

“Don’t be so silly.” She adjusted herself so that she settled more neatly back into him. “You are always so silly.”

“It keeps me sane,” he said softly, just behind her ear.

Dee shivered a little and her smile calmed as she leaned against his chest. “I guess I’ve got Sammy Jr. to do that for me.”

“So you like the name?” Sam asked mock-hopefully.

Dee’s nose wrinkled. “Not at all. Be more creative.”

“Hermes if it’s a boy,” offered Athena from across the room where she nursed Hera on one of the Cylon couches.

Dee laughed a little. “Oh, poor boy!”

“It’s better than Zeus,” Sam commented.

“I want him—or her—to have a normal name,” Dee said with a sigh. “They’re going to be born into a strange world, there should be something that’s plain and simple.”

Athena nodded. All by themselves, following their quest for Earth, the Cylons could be close and a family. But deep down, conflict and confusion still reigned, and any moment might erupt. After all, the Final Five were different, even if no one knew officially how; not all the Cylons even wanted individuality.

“What about Robin, for boy or girl,” Sam offered, still focusing on the task at hand.

“Hmm,” was Dee’s only comment.

“Morgan?” Sam offered next.

Dee giggled.

“What?” Sam asked.

“Reminds me of that old pirate movie, with the Dread Pirate Morgan,” Dee said, and it was the first time she’d been able to pull up a human memory without wincing.

“You know, he kind of reminds me of Tigh,” Sam mused a second later.

The surreality made Dee lose it. “Argh, mateys,” she said in an imitation-Tigh growl, keeping the tone lively.

“Tell the Hybrid, three points off to starboard.” Sam squinted one eye.

“Even though there isn’t a starboard,” Dee said, still in her pirate voice. “Not really, in a three dimensional space.”

“Gar, my wench, there’s no science in pirates,” Sam growled, nipping at her neck.

Dee giggled again. “You are _too silly_ , Sam Anders.”

“And?” he asked in his normal voice as his cheek rested against hers.

And, Dee didn’t mind. Good humor might be all they had to keep away memories of the human families they’d had; the ones that had forced them out, the ones that probably still feared every day that they’d come back and wipe them all out. Good humor had to be pushed to its limits to keep them going.

But as Dee lay in Sam’s arms, as his large hand rested softly over her belly and his chin snugly lay where her neck met her shoulder, she didn’t think it was so bad after all. She and Sam had found themselves on the same page from the very day after the shocking revelation, had found themselves needing a connection other than just Cylonity, and after admitting just how much they felt shaken and lost it was easy to find each other.

They didn’t always work out perfectly, but nothing did, not anymore. Wanting the same thing still united them, though, more than even this child could. More than shared Cylon blood, as the drifting unity of the models proved every day.

ooo

With Lee, it always had to be an answer about now. Some days the urgency thrilled her— “Just think of something, Lee, it’s why you got elected anyways.” But not today, and Kara made to turn away. She didn’t like him like this; it reminded her of when it was just a one night stand with Baltar before he was revealed as a collaborator, and before Anders had been revealed as a Cylon, the times when Lee came across as nothing so much as jealous. Like they couldn’t work together unless she was with him on every little thing he did, and it wasn’t like he was asking for her sacrifice, because he didn’t seem to realize that it would be a sacrifice. He’d get it eventually, but then what?

“Don’t leave it like this, Kara,” Lee said. He put a hand to her hair and stroked it pleadingly, and at least his touch was still warm. “I’m sorry, I didn’t think it’d be—”

“Well, next time, do,” she said quietly, firmly. She’d thought he’d be less worked up once he had her commitment, she honestly had. Which didn’t make sense, given what she’d known of Lee for all that time. But sometimes she forgot that Starbuck and Apollo were not the same as Kara and Lee, and Lee just didn’t think like Kara.

He leaned in to give her a light kiss as an apology and she let him, breathing out and wishing he would focus his great love for her onto paying more attention. Maybe he would. Maybe they wouldn’t quite fall out of the frying pan into the fire. Kara had to keep trying.

ooo

Besides herself and Sam in the armchair, Dee realized that Athena and Hera were the only ones remaining in this artificially constructed lounge they’d created—just before a Six walked in on-edge.

“What is it?” asked Sam.

“Isn’t there a room other than this one on this basestar that is not full of love-making couples?” she asked with an expression more pissed than offended.

Dee just rolled her eyes as Sam laughed and said, “We’re safe here.”

“Tigh and Ellen again?” Athena asked as Six sat next to her.

“I’m immune to that,” the Six said, sighing. “And thankfully my sister and Baltar never even leave their room, let alone leave the door open. But right by the _Hybrid_?”

“Tory and Leoben,” Sam guessed and sighed.

Dee shook her head. “Wow.” Tory’s idea of finding a connection to her new Cylon community was a little more frantic and emotionally driven, surprising to all who had known her, but Leoben seemed to understand perfectly. Not that it made it any less odd, because, well, it was Leoben—but if they worked, no one else was going to complain.

“It’s just a bit much,” the Six said, and leaned back in her seat.

“That’s it.” Athena perked up.

“What’s it?” Sam asked.

“We’re on the Love Boat,” Athena said with a twisted grin.

“What?” The Six looked confused.

“Well, they were talking about pirates...” Athena started to explain, and then let it trail off as the Six’s eyes widened and Sam and Dee snickered. “No, that about sums it up, right?”

“Are they insane?” Six asked Athena in a stage whisper, gaze piercingly unamused.

“Very much so,” Sam sighed in response.

But oddly enough, it was a human kind of insane. Not that the humans would live like this crazy Love Boat basestar. But they could, if they’d wanted to. For all that he was trying to forget everything they’d left behind, Sam wondered how much of it was still here after all.

Maybe one day they’d stop having to play at being silly to keep the fact that they were Cylons—Cylons!—from driving them to a worse kind of crazy.

With Dee in his arms, he had hope that the day would come soon.


End file.
